Tag: friends

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Sunday Views: Whatever Happened to Good Books For Girls?

Yesterday, my daughter was telling me one of her many stories from school, and she asked me if I had ever seen a boy who was interested in girlish activities. I asked her what do “girlish activities” mean, and she told me that they are things like playing with dolls, doing arts and crafts, making loom bands etc. Mind you, this is an almost 9-year-old who has never played with dolls, and whose elder brother was obsessed with making loom bands at one point in time. Naturally, I was very concerned.

I tried to explain to her that there is no such thing as girlish or boyish activities; everyone should be free to do what they like without fear of judgement, and that she needs to support her friends rather than judge them. After all, she has never been interested in dolls, and likes to play volleyball and tennis.

This conversation got me thinking about things that are influencing children’s minds these days, and how it is impossible to keep them away from these influences. I have tried to stay away from assigning gender specific roles to my children. Everyone is supposed to pitch in, and there are no girls’ chores or boys’ chores. Of course there are times when some things are for boys, and some for girls, but by and large, I have encouraged them to do what they like.

A few years back, when the kids were younger and didn’t have access to iPads and laptops, they were only allowed to watch one TV channel, and that too for only an hour. During that hour, there was one cartoon that always made me irritated and I hated that my kids seemed to love it. There was nothing wrong with the cartoon itself as it was about a six-year-old boy called Eliot Kid, who had wild imagination. What made me see red, was the fact that this boy had two best friends, and the girl best friend was in love with Eliot, while Eliot was in love with the most popular girl in his class, who was blonde and a stereotype if I ever saw one! Now, what in the world made the creators of this cartoon think that it is ok for six-year-olds to moon over the opposite sex, effectively telling children all over the world that it is not possible for a girl and a boy to be just friends even at such a young age?

Then, my daughter grew up a bit and started reading. She is not as prolific a reader as her brothers, but she does like to read. At first, I had trouble getting her interested in books since her brothers were more into mysteries and adventures, while she seemed to prefer something different. I was really happy when she found her type of books in The Naughtiest Girl and Malory Towers book series by Enid Blyton. Her reading preferences were different from the boys, but she was her own individual, and I loved that she was different.

Then came the popular books. Kids in her school were reading The Dork Diaries, and I was letting the boys read Diary of a Wimpy Kid, so why couldn’t she read what her friends were reading. Fair enough. Hence started the invasion of books like Dear Dumb Diary, Dork Diaries, and various Jacqueline Wilson books. I had little choice in the matter, not because my daughter is stubborn, but because there are so few options.

I understand that girls and boys have different tastes, and I don’t want to force any of my kids to read anything they don’t want to, but is it necessary to have such a stark contrast between a “boys” book and a “girls” book? While boys are always off on adventures, playing sports, or being naughty at school, girls are giggling away over makeup and boys. I’m sick and tired of reading about girls who don’t fit in because of what they wear, and who suddenly become acceptable because they start wearing makeup and nice clothes; or girls who like boys and spend a whole book trying to catch their attention; or mean girls who have nothing better to do than torment other girls, and who are always the best dressed with their makeup on point.

The books that are being written for upper elementary and middle school age girls are reminiscent of the books I used to read in my teens. I don’t want my daughter to be conscious of her looks or her dressing. She is too young to be worrying about that. She has to learn that she can be friends with everyone without there being an element of romance and talk of crushes. She needs to be comfortable in her own skin, and with all like-minded people, regardless of their gender.

Thankfully, my daughter is being raised with a brother who is just one year older to her, making him her best friend, and both of them comfortable with each other’s friends. However, as they spend more and more time in school, I cannot help but wonder if things will stay this way for long.

Recently, a friend has recommended a few books that seem to be different from the usual books displayed prominently in every bookstore. I’m trying to get these books and can’t wait for my daughter to read them. Until then, I will keep trying to get her to read the A Wrinkle in Time series, and if I’m very, very lucky, maybe Anne of Green Gables.

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Review: The Missing

Rating: 3 Stars

The Missing by C. L. Taylor, is the story of a family torn apart by the disappearance of their son/ brother. Billy Wilkinson, a troubled fifteen-year-old, goes missing after an argument with his parents. Six months later, there is still no sign of Billy, and his family is splintering under the stress and uncertainty.

Claire Wilkinson, Billy’s mother, feels it in her bones that Billy is still alive, and so, she is eager to send out a second appeal for information. At the press conference, things don’t go according to plan, and Claire begins to realise that her family has been keeping secrets from each other. All of them have a reason to feel guilty about Billy’s disappearance, and slowly the truth begins to unravel in front of Claire’s eyes.

On top of all this, Claire starts having blackouts, waking up in most unusual and scary places, with no memory of the preceding hours. In these circumstances, as you read on, you realise that Claire, as a narrator, is not so reliable herself.

The book is fast paced and interesting. It shows the stress that families go through when a loved one goes missing, and how every individual has a different way of dealing with the stress. There is also the element of teenage angst and rebellion, and the unpredictability of a teenager’s mind. The overall picture that is painted here, however, is creepy and somewhat disgusting.

As the mom of a teenage son, I was not comfortable with reading about a delinquent fifteen-year-old and his rebellious attitude. There are some things that become horrifying when read in the context of a teenager. It is so in this book as well. The truth, when revealed, is so disgusting and revolting, that you wish you hadn’t read it.

As a story, there is suspense in the story, until about halfway through, when the message exchanges between two unknown individuals start making sense. From there on, you are almost sure about what must have happened. Still, the story keeps you interested till the end, which in my opinion is a bit of a letdown. After using such language, imagery and story arcs, the end seems too tame and predictable to me. Nonetheless, the book is interesting and worth a read if you are a fan of dark psychological thrillers.
Warning: This book contains sex, strong language, and Paedophilia.

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Review: The French Girl

Rating: 3.5 Stars

I bought The French Girl by Lexie Elliott while I was just browsing around the bookstore, waiting for my kids to make up their minds about what to get. I had never seen this book around and had no idea about ratings and reviews. Fortunately, when I scanned it on my Goodreads shelves, my phone started acting up, and I couldn’t see the rating for this books, nor even one review! So, this was one book I really went into blind.

The story revolves around a crime committed a decade ago, which has just come to light. The body of Severine, a 19-year-old French girl, is discovered in a well on a farmhouse in France. The girl was last seen with six Oxford students who were on the farm for a week during the summer, 10 years ago. With one of them dead, suspicion falls on the remaining five, who have all gone on to have successful careers.

Kate Channing had never liked Severine, and that last night of the holiday remains one of the worst memories of her life. But now, Severine has come to haunt her, and her own memories of that last night seem to be changing. As the investigation proceeds, Kate realizes that for one thing, Severine’s ghost will not leave her alone, and for another, somehow she has become the prime suspect for the murder of the girl. As it dawns on her that she has been wrong about everyone who was with her that week, she must figure out what really happened that night, or risk losing everything she has worked so hard to achieve.

The book started off with Kate getting the news of Severine’s body being discovered, and immediately things start happening. So, the book grips you from the beginning as you follow Kate, who is the narrator of the story. As you get used to the speed of things, the pacing slows down about a quarter into the story. For a while it seems like nothing is happening, and you’re just wasting time. This, however, does not take away the reader’s interest because by now, you really want to know what really happened.

There is no real mystery about the culprit here. Even though a couple of characters are made out to be mysterious and cryptic, there is only one who is the villain of this story. The thing that keeps you reading is the great narrative, and that very, very thin thread of what seems like a creepy, supernatural phenomenon!

The plot itself is average, and there are many things that are too predictable. From the first time you read about Tom and Kate’s friendship, you know that there will be a romantic angle somewhere along the way. Similarly, as soon as you learn about the pregnancy of one of the characters, you know that the author is too kind-hearted to make anything bad happen to the woman! There are many such things that come in the realm of cliches, but it still doesn’t matter, because you like where the story is going.

The French Girl is the kind of novel you take on a holiday or to the pool. You don’t need to be glued to it all the time, or having palpitations just reading it. It is a good thriller, which, while not your average egde-of-the-seat affair, is still interesting and engaging. I really enjoyed reading this one.

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Review: The Hazel Wood

Rating: 4 Stars

Wow! What can I say about this book? Let me tell you right now that this book is not everyone’s cup of tea. Once in a while, a book comes along that you really like even when you can see the weaknesses in the story. This is one such book. I was transported into a world so dark and fantastic, a world of creepy fairy tales, that I didn’t really care about anything else but getting out of this world alive!

Alice is the grand-daughter of a once-famous author of sinister fairy tales, who she has never met. This is because for the seventeen years that she has been alive, she and her mother, Ella, have been running away from the bad luck that seems to be following them everywhere. When they get the news that her grandmother is dead, Alice and her mother draw a breath of relief and decide to restart their lives, believing the bad days behind them.

Then Ella is kidnapped and Alice decides to find her grandmother’s estate in order to free Ella. Her frustration mounts as she realizes that she has no knowledge of the fairy tales written by her grandmother about the fantastical Hinterland. With the help of a classmate, Ellery, who happens to be a fan of the Hinterland stories, Alice sets off to find her mother, and eventually, the truth about their lives.

As Alice and Ellery start their quest, you realize that nothing is as it seems, and the fairy tales are dark and full of horrors. The characters and the world they inhabit is chilling and deeply disturbing. There are no good guys in these stories, and Alice herself is a part of this world. It is a race against time, because time in Hinterland is not the same as that in our world. Years can pass in the blink of an eye, and days can seem to last forever. It is in this world that Alice has to fight her destiny and change her story before she is sucked back into it forever.

I always love a story that takes you into a dark world where you have to fight the demons inside you more than the ones on the outside. The Hazel Wood took me into this world, and all I can think about after finishing it is that I really want to read all these fairy tales. Someone, please find me a copy of Tales From The Hinterland!

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Review: The Keeper of Lost Things

Rating: 4 Stars

The Keeper of Lost Things by Ruth Hogan is a sweet book. It is a story of love and loss, and of lost things and people. As I write this, I realize that the simpler the story, the more difficult it is to write a review. Not because the story has nothing in it, but because it is a simple tale with no hidden meanings or life lessons.

Anthony Peardew collects lost things, not for himself, but in the hope that one day he can restore them to their real owners. So he goes about collecting objects he finds in different places; things like hair bobbles, jigsaw puzzle pieces, bracelets, and a biscuit tin containing some dead person’s ashes. All these things are kept safe in his study, duly labelled with the time and place of their discovery. But Anthony is growing old, and he needs to leave his collection with someone who will love it the same way he does, and who will work towards restoring the objects to their rightful owners.

Laura is Anthony’s assistant and as lost as one of Anthony’s things. When she finds out what Anthony has left her, she is overwhelmed by the task in front of her. With the help of a handsome gardener, a girl with Down Syndrome, a mangy dog, and a crazy ghost, Laura sets out to restore the lost things to their rightful owners, finding her own way in the process, and putting an end to the restlessness caused by a particular chain of events forty years ago.

The book is heartwarming and funny. It keeps going back and forth in time, with two different narratives that merge into one over a time period of forty years. Both stories are equally poignant with some laugh-out-loud and some heartbreaking moments. It took me a few days to read because I was on a break and busy with other things, but once I really got into it, I finished it in one night.

Read this book if you want a change of pace and some light hearted, sweet fun. This was a four star read for me.

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Review: Neverwhere

Rating: 4.5 Stars

There are some books that I would never even have thought of buying if it hadn’t been for Instagram. This applies to Fantasy more than any other genre. I don’t know why that is, because I have read some fantastic books belonging to the genre during the last year or so. Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman is one of them.

Neverwhere is the story of Richard Mayhew, who moves to London from a small Scottish town. At first overwhelmed in such a big city, he soon settles into a routine and his awe with London recedes. Then he meets Jessica, who is way out of his league and turns him into a scatter brain, and Richard finds himself engaged to a woman much more ambitious and determined than him.

One evening, when everything seems to be going wrong for Richard, he stumbles upon a bleeding girl on the street, and stops to help her. If things were bad before, they become unbearably worse after his decision to defy Jessica and help a fellow human in need. For the injured girl is the Lady Door from Neverwhere.

Neverwhere is the shadowy reflection of London which exists underneath the London known to man. It is a world with monsters and assassins, angels and demons, and everything that has ever slipped through the cracks of the real world into this underground world.

Richard is drawn unwillingly into this world when it seems that he has stopped existing in London Above. Now he has to stick to Door and her shady companions if he ever wants to go back to his former life. But the Lady Door is on a suicide mission to avenge the death of her family at the hands of the most gruesome and terrifying murderers that history has ever seen, and it seems likely that Richard will just be one of the casualties of this crazy quest.

As grave and serious as the story sounds, it is anything but. It is irreverant and witty, and I fell in love with most of the characters. While Richard is funny as the clueless man being taken on an adventure against his will, and Door is admirable in her quest to find out the truth, it is the Marquis de Carabas who steals the show! And yes, the Marquis is named after the fictional Marquis from the very famous fairy tale, Puss in Boots.

Neverwhere is a roller coaster ride of adventure, as the motley crew consisting of Richard, Door, de Carabas and Hunter, the bodyguard, dashes across London Above and Neverwhere to find the answers needed to solve their problems. The characters they meet on the way are no less remarkable. Whether it is Anaesthesia, the rat girl, the Earl from Earl’s Court or the Angel Islington, every character is tongue-in-cheek and batshit crazy!

It would be remiss of me if I don’t mention the two terrifying murderers who are after Door from the beginning of the book. They are the main villians, and as villainous as a villian can ever hope to be. Maybe even more. They are Mr. Croup and Mr. Vandemar. They are filthy and disgusting, with terrible table manners and no sense of humour. And they are hilarious! Even when they are dismembering and torturing living things, their banter doesn’t stop.

At the end of the edition I was reading, is a bonus story about my favourite, Marquis de Carabas. And it was a bonus, because I have not had my fill of this wonderful, mad world called Neverwhere, and would love to visit it again some time. A fun read to take your mind off real world problems.

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Review: Beartown

Rating: 4.5 Stars

After the last book mail I got, I had made a To Be Read pile and decided to read the books starting from the top. Beartown by Fredrik Backman was at the bottom of the pile because of its size. When I got disillusioned by a couple of books from the top, I was very tempted to cheat, take it out from the bottom and read it before the other books. After all, this book was written by the same author who wrote A Man Called Ove, and it was sure to be the pick-me-up I needed after reading some very mediocre books.

I’m glad I didn’t give in to my impulse. I’m glad I only read it after I had finished the other books in the pile. Infact, I should have waited a couple of more days before reading it. Because I still have a couple of reviews to write, and I sat down to write them too, but this book has completely, utterly left me unable to think of anything else! It has destroyed me. I have begun to question my sanity in not reading the reviews first and being blindsided by this heavyweight of a book.

Beartown is a very small town, becoming smaller by the day, with no prospects and no future, except for the junior ice hockey team. This team is what represents hope for the town, and this team is what the whole town revolves around. The book starts very slowly, as we get to know all the characters. And there are a lot of them, a whole town’s worth.

Normally, I give up trying to read a book long before I reach even a 100 pages, if nothing has happened. I don’t know what made me go on reading when all I wanted to do was put the book down and forget about it. I’m still not sure if I’m happy about sticking to it. I don’t like being so attached to fictional characters that I can feel their pain in my heart. It sucks.
Fair Warning: This book deals with rape and its aftermath.

The rape, when it happens, is shocking and violent, and sadly, echoes so many real-life incidents that you just stop reading for a while and need a moment to absorb it all. This, however, only leaves you feeling angry and wanting justice. What follows is what is really heart wrenching. For it reflects what every survivor has to go through. When a boy tells her to go to the police, the girl says it doesn’t matter because no one will believe her. Because the rapist is a hockey player. And Beartown is a hockey town.

Everything that happens in the book from that point on, is just how small towns, small hockey towns, small hockey towns that have nothing else to look forward to, react when their start player is accused of a crime by a girl. Nothing that happens is out of the ordinary. It is what would happen in any small town in the world where such a crime was committed. And this is what makes it so sad and heartbreaking.

What makes it all bearable is that when a family, already devastated by a tragedy, stands up against a whole town, there are still people who are brave enough to stand with them. Even if they are so few that they can be counted on the fingers of one hand, there is someone who has enough guts to stand up and tell everyone how wrong they are, there is someone who believes the word of the girl over that of the hockey star, there is someone who eventually, at the expense of everything they hold dear, is willing to tell the truth. This, after all, is also the story of individuals with big hearts and guilty consciences, individuals cut from the same cloth as the rest of the town, but with a different thinking.

In the end, you’re left feeling cheated, because there is no neat end to the chain of events that started on that one night. We’re given some glimpses of the future, and we know that life has gone on for everyone involved, and to some extent, it seems that justice has been served. Just not in the way you wanted.

Reading this book was a gut wrenching experience for me, and then I found out that there is also a sequel! No. My heart cannot stand it. I don’t know if I can gather enough courage to read through another book like this, but this will definitely remain one of those books that made me break down in tears. I’m almost afraid to think what Fredrik Backman has in store for this little town next.

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Review: The Chalk Man

Rating: 5 Stars

Finally, a crime thriller that I could really sink my teeth into! The Chalk Man by C. J. Tudor is different in that it has a male protagonist and narrator. I have really become disillusioned with crazy females doing crazy shit, trying to become Amy Dunne! Here we have a middle-aged man, battling with his own demons, trying to appear as normal as possible, and failing to do so.

Eddie Adams is a British twelve-year-old in 1986, hanging out in his small town with his four friends, when their lives are changed irrevocably. A new albino teacher, Mr. Halloran, with the help of Eddie, saves the life of a girl after a freak accident at the fair, and from there it all starts unraveling fast as summer fades into autumn and the beginning of the new school year.

Eddie’s mom is a doctor and her newly opened clinic earns the wrath of the local vicar, who happens to be the father of one of Eddie’s group of friends. The vicar is a nasty man, whose own daughter seems to be scared of him. Eddie’s dad gets into a fight with the vicar at a birthday party and things become tense in a previously sleepy town.

The children, aware of the new tensions, spend most of their time trying to get the most out of the remaining summer. This includes coming up with a secret code to send each other messages with. The code involves making different symbols and stick figures with coloured chalk. each of them has a different coloured chalk so they can figure out who sent what message. Soon, however, they tire of this game and move on to other pursuits.

As things become worse in the town, the final blow comes when the dismembered body of a girl is discovered, with her head missing. The main suspect is Mr. Halloran. Eddie is sure of his innocence even as his normally easy-going parents think otherwise. As the police close the case, everyone thinks that things will finally go back to normal.

Thirty years later, Eddie Adams is a middle-aged, single, English teacher with a drinking problem, still living in his hometown. He gets a letter with a piece of chalk. The letter has a stick figure drawn on it. Memories of that long ago summer have left their scars on everyone, and it all starts coming back to Eddie now. When an old friend’s drowned body is found, Eddie realizes that things did not end thirty years ago, and he has to find the truth before another body turns up. The problem is that he cannot trust anyone, not even his closest friends, because everyone in this town has a secret to keep.

The character of Eddie Adams is interesting. The way he narrates the book, you know you shouldn’t trust him along with anyone else in this book. That he is a kleptomaniac, is established early on in the book. On top of that, he is a sleepwalker who has trouble differentiating between his dreams and reality. And his dreams are really creepy. He is flaky and vague, and is in no way a reliable narrator.

The book is fast paced and gripping. It makes you hold your breath and wait for what comes next. There are so many twists and turns that take you by surprise. Even if you’re able to predict some things, there is still a lot that makes you feel dizzy. For a fan of thrillers, this book is the perfect read. It made me remember why I love this genre so much!

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Sunday Musings: Celebrating International Women’s Day

It was International Women’s Day on Thursday, and all I saw on social media were posts about empowering women and girl power etc. I wanted to post something profound too, and racked my brain for a good idea. Alas, all I could hear in my brain was cheap Bollywood songs (which I had been listening to all day Wednesday) and how I needed to fortify myself before my son’s friends showed up for their play date in the evening! My brain becomes a useless organ when I need it to function the most. So I just gave up the idea of being deep and profound.

Then I thought maybe I could post something funny and witty (my brain refused to help me there either) but I had to drop that idea too because making fun will only lead to people being offended and telling me that I’m an evil woman who doesn’t care for the suffering of her sisters. It is after all “THE” thing to do – get offended by others’ opinions, while citing “Freedom of Speech” for your own. Le sigh.

So here I was with nothing to say about the most important day in a woman’s life. It’s women like me who bring down other women, not sharing their enthusiasm about such a landmark day! Just the thought of this had me scrambling to write an apology to my fellow sisters for being insensitive and unfeeling. Again, this useless brian of mine! Every word I wrote seemed like it would be offensive to someone, and I couldn’t take the pressure. Also, I thought, no one likes an apologist any way, so I’d better come up with some other idea.

With no ideas forthcoming, I thought I’d better get on with the cooking and cleaning. But it was my day, and I’ll be damned if I cooked or cleaned on my day! No way! My kids should be bringing me flowers, and my husband should be taking me out to dinner! I knew realistically it won’t be possible; said children have school from which they come back in the evening, and said husband was out of town for his office work. Still, cooking and cleaning were out of question for today.

As I was thinking about all this, my cleaning woman came to do her work. Oh, how I wish I had agreed to a man coming to clean the house, when given the option. Then I could have made him work without feeling guilty. I never plan for the future! So, I thought I’d give the maid a day off for Women’s Day, but she looked at me like I was crazy and said that she would rather work since she was being paid hourly. This Women’s Day was turning out to be a nightmare for me!

All was not lost though. I could still refuse to cook. That would show my kids. They need to remember these days, after all! So, I put away everything that I had taken out, and sat down with my book and went on to enjoy the day like I deserved after working so hard.

My ungrateful kids, though! They came home (with friends, I might add), and asked what we were having for dinner. I told them I hadn’t cooked anything because it was a special day for me. “But you didn’t cook anything yesterday either, or the day before. So what’s so special about that?” Pesky little so-and-so’s. “Mom, it’s Thursday. You never cook on Thursdays. We were just asking about what to order in!” Have I mentioned how I hate my kids?

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Review: Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine

Rating: 4 Stars

Some books make you think long and hard about what you want to say about them, and it seems impossible to find the words to do them justice. Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine by Gail Honeyman, is one such book. It made me laugh with its wit and sarcasm, while making me sad at the same time. The mark of a good book is that it makes you think and doesn’t leave you even after you have finished reading it. This is one of those books.

Eleanor Oliphant has no friends, no social skills, and no ambition. She says whatever comes into her mind without any filters, and sarcasm comes as naturally to her as breathing. Her life is fine and she doesn’t know that there is something better than just “fine”. She has had the same job for the last nine years, and she has no plans of going anywhere. Then one day, she sees the man she knows she is destined to marry, and decides to change things so that she can have the family she always wanted.

Alas, her computer decides to give up on her the next day, and she meets Raymond, an unkempt, unfit, smoker with no sense of dressing. Eleanor is ready to forget about him and carry on with her plans, when an old man, Sammy, collapses on the street and Eleanor and Raymond help get him to the hospital. This starts a chain of events that take Eleanor on a completely different path and change her life forever.

Raymond, with his casual clothes, running shoes, and cigarette stink, is the first person to befriend Eleanor and show her how it takes just one good friend to turn your life from fine, to better than fine. Raymond’s kindness and friendship lead Eleanor to finally face the demons she has been running from and realize that she too can move forward in the world.

Eleanor’s struggles with becoming “normal” are what provide the biggest laughs, as does her vocabulary, which is so extensive that I had to look up a few of the words myself. Her way of talking and explaining things left me reeling most of the time. The sarcasm is cutting and on point; and her exasperation with the human race in general, amusing. I think Eleanor Oliphant may well become one of my favourite fictional characters.

However, all through the book you can feel the spectre of Eleanor’s past and how it has shaped her, and you cannot help but feel heavy-hearted. You feel sad for this girl raised in foster homes, with no family to turn to. She doesn’t have any social graces because she wasn’t taught any. There was no one to tell her how to be social, or how to make friends, or even how to expect better from her life. She has some deep scars, both physical and psychological, that have never been healed.

Even with all the baggage, once you get to know her, you cannot help but like her. With her, what you see is what you get. As she interacts with Raymond, Raymond’s mom, Sammy, Sammy’s family and her office colleagues, she realizes that she too can have a life that is better than “fine”. She is after all Eleanor Oliphant and she is a survivor.

An enjoyable, emotional book. A must-read in my opinion.

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